That seems to be a fitting way to close this blog as well; its not the end, it’s only finished, until we start again, until we visit again. Of course, a long sabbatical like this comes once in 7 years, and we picked a wonderful time, a time to share in Elan and Nomi as a young couple, to share in Shoshana’s early months when every day brings a new trick, a new milestone;
to enjoy watching Ariel dive head first into Yeshiva life, as we knew he would, and to be able to share in Monty and Daniella’s first trip to Israel as a married couple. We went at a time when health was good, when we could walk to the third floor of our apartment with the sacks (and backpacks) of groceries and not complain, and wander up and down the hilly landscape that makes up Jerusalem. (Trivia Question: How many stairs from Top to bottom in Yemin Moshe?) Ask Barbara for the answer.We worked, we played and we enjoyed the family immensely. I think, actually, I know, that the feeling was mutual. It was a very precious time, and I hope over the years we can look back and truly appreciate what an opportunity it was.
But did we learn anything?
Sometimes I assume that question means did I learn anything new in the lab, did we find something interesting, did we advance out work. Other times, I think it is an invitation to comment on things we saw and found fun, strange, interesting or even frustrating. So in no particular order, this is some of what I learned.
Happily, I learned that there are wonderful exceptions to even the most entrenched behavior patterns. Last week I talked about the distance synagogues in most places we encountered keep from strangers. Then, we (Elan, Nomi, Shoshana, Ariel and I) went to visit Ruth and Itamar Maliach in Givat Shmuel and their amazing minyan/synagogue called Lechu Nerrranena. This place has a packed house on Friday nights with the largest adult Carlebach prayer I have seen. But more so, they go out of their way to greet newcomers and strangers, starting right from their president Baruch Kaplan, on down. The spirit and prayer is exceptional. The previous time we were there I really felt we need to bring some of their concept of ruach in prayer back to some of our synagogues, although I must say our own Ahavat Ysrael Minyan has a lot of that on a much smaller scale, and B”Z is as friendly a community that you can find.
I learned that timing is everything, and never be afraid to keep trying. I had not succeeded in reaching our friends the Grossman’s till 2 weeks before I left. Hadas was pregnant and due any day. One day before Nir and I were supposed to meet for lunch, Hadas gave birth to a boy.
This allowed me to spend part of my last day at the Grossman Brit milah in the settlement of Nofei Prat. There were lots of people, great food, and even a couple of ex Montrealer’s (Yoni and Shira) and two of our former Kollel boys. Since I took the bus there, I got a detailed tour of Maaleh Adumim as a throw in prize; it brought back memories of my first trip there in ’78 when it was a few trailers in the desert. It is now a large sprawling city with an industrial park! Anyone who wants the link to the pictures of the brit, please email me.I learned that, like with all other things in Israel, Egged city bus schedules are only a suggestion. Two examples: to catch the bus to Nofie Prat (there is only two in the AM and two in the PM) I had to take the 13 bus at our corner at 5:58. I was up very early and got there at 5:50, which was good since the bus came at 5:53. The next “scheduled” bus was 30 minutes later, too late to catch the 173 (but who knows when it would REALLY come!). Then last week was the piece de resitance. Every day, I took the 19 to Hadassah Ein Kerem. This bus is supposed to run every 10-15 minutes all day, but had the annoying habit of two buses frequently coming at the same time after a 25-30 minute wait. Last week, though, after I waited almost half an hour, one came, then another (I got on the 2nd since the first was packed), then a third, and halfway to the hospital a 4th pulled up along side. They played leap frog till they arrived at the Medical Center. Unbelievable!
I learned that even in the middle of Jerusalem, sometimes you don’t get a minyan; like the guy yesterday AM at 6 on the corner of Yafo near King George trying to find another male Jew to join in prayer.
I learned that sometimes, you really need to step back and look at things
from the big picture, in your work, in your family and in your life. We had a fun going away tea party for myself and a graduating PhD student from the lab I was in. There were lots of nice things that were said about everyone, as it should be at these things, but one thing ran clear for me. It was that, due to the circumstances of the Sabbatical, I was able to really spend time listening to, training and teaching the students in Francesca’s lab, something I very much enjoy doing. And even though I normally have three jobs, and run from lab to hospital and can’t sit still for 5 minutes, I think this is an important facet to bring back. If you are training doctors, rabbis, scientists or even brick layers, there is no substitute fortime, patience, and an open ear to help someone without experience build and grow.
I also learned that there is not substitute for time invested in family. Of course, you are saying, you knew that already. Yes, I did and I do and I never take this for granted. It also comes under the rubric of stepping back, though. And making sure you take the time, use the time, and
cherish the time. As an example, I think initially Ariel was a bit frustrated by our presence until he realized we would give him his space. So two weeks ago, he called on Thursday night, and asked “Are you going away for Shabbat this week?” When I told him no, he said “Good, I’ve been sick all week and I need to crash” You never want one of your kids to be sick, but the concept and the connection was very important to me (as was his superb recovery by later on Saturday after a good nights’ sleep, and a couple of good meals). Examples like that, like Tuesday night dinners, walking with the baby, learning with Elan, discussing life and other issues with the boys…all special things that need not only to be experienced but be taken for what they really are, a blessing.On that note, let me wish Monty a major league Mazel tov on is acceptance to Technion Medical School. He is still waiting for other schools, but I can tell you wherever he goes he will make a great physician.
Please wish refuah shlema for Gilad Hillel ben Bracha Mirel, Naama Bracha bat Devorah and Tamar Dina bat Smadar
Condolences to Jeff and Rochelle on the untimely passing of their sister in law.
And in closing, let me wish the most special Shabbat Shalom to you all, but especially to my beautiful wife Barbara, without whom the last 6 Shabbatot were not the same. I look forward to never taking for granted the special times we have together for may more years.
And to us all, Next year in Jerusalem!
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